Let's examine a picture of English Teacher X, shall we?
Look at that, not a fucking hair on his head. And shaped like a goddamned snowman. Or something. What the fuck is going on with that shit? He hasn't even got any feet, or arms? How could slavic chicks go for that shit? WHAT A MORON!!
Anyway, my life at the Gap is really cool, I get free pleated chinos sometimes. And LOADS of hot babes come in for low-market sportwear.
14 comments:
What the hell is all that crap? He can't even draw! What's all that colored crap floating around his head, anyway?
I fucked him last year, and both of his testicles smell like cheese. It's not pleasant at all.
Let's talk STUPID -- devoting yourself to a cause as MORONIC as international communication, when you could be selling pinstriped oxfords and ribbed tees.
My god, can't we all just get along?
Let's just get a few of the obvious things out of the way, and OUT English Teacher X. His actual name is David Broadbent, a 15-year-old boy living and writing in Davenport, Iowa. David has been an alocholic since he was eleven, but began attending AA meetings a few years ago and was told it might be therapeutic to write down some of his thoughts and memories. Having visited Russia once with his Mormon missionary grandfather, he decided it might be fun to create an imaginary character based in Russia to write about. He came up with English Teacher X.
Why, just look at his poor spelling -- and grammar -- this guy is supposed to be an English teacher? No, no, this is all a big trolling, and you've all been fooled.
Let's talk inaccuracies in his stories. Why, there's one where he claims that he went down "a waterslide" after making out with some girl whose "boobies" were hanging out on the beach. A waterslide, on the beach, in Russia? Does that sound logical to you?
NOTE TO READERS: GAP kid was about to type something really witty and cutting, something that would have made X cry and his cronies suck their teeth.
But then he found something better to do. That left testacle won't scratch itself!!
X. You are your own worst enemy my friend. Now everyone KNOWS that you leave 86.777% of the comments on your own site.
Chump.
Ahhh, I wish I had thought of such a genius blog as this. I can't say how I will spend sleepless nights in bed dreaming of witty diatribes to sling at X. Having worked with that narcissistic bastard, I have plenty to air. Oh, I have seen the X, and he doesn't actually look like an armless, balding snowman. I shall reveal the true identity of this depository of Slavic whore disease. I have found the ground upon which I can now stand, trident raised, broad of chest and belittle this useless deviate.
English Teacher X is a fuckin' morphadite.
you made this up englishteacherX!!!
Hey Chastity, nice try!
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