I've quit being a Director of Studies just to do privates.
I fucking LOVE private students. Especially rich guys. Guys are cool. The hairier and more surly and rich they are, the better. They'll pay me hundreds of dollars for sitting in their plush offices smelling their shitty aftershave while they struggle to pronounce simple sentences. In fact, my privates pay me thousands of dollars an hour because I'm the fucking tits.
Fuck those classes full of young cute university students at the institutes! Man I fucking LOVE rich guys, cuz if I'm lucky they'll take me out on their boats, and treat me like a pet dog.
And they cancel all the time and go on vacation every two weeks, so at least I don't have to suffer with them too often. Though I don't get paid for that. Oh, and my salary is halved by travel time, too. But fuck that because sitting listening to rich guys drone on is awesome. It's MUCH better than being the boss of a language school and working 20 hours a week. Having no visa support is really cool too, because I'm a thrill seeker. By nature.
The other cool thing is the future job opportunities -- when I leave Bumfuck and go to some place where I'm NOT the only foreign English speaker in town, it will look AWESOME on my resume to put "teaching a bunch of rich doofuses privately."
And the money rocks. Because you know, I do this for the cash -- I mean, I decided not to go to medical school just to become an English teacher, because they're all so rich. ALL ABOUT THE YAROSLAVS BAY-BEEEEEE!!!!
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66 comments:
Like the deleted comments on the last post, English Comment Filter X.
Yeah MR FILTER, pretty disingenious of you DELETING YOUR OWN COMMENTS!! "Comment deleted by AUTHOR." Yeah, you're a fucking FASCIST all right.
Thank you for clearing all that up X!
Now I know why you're the DOS. You're too incompetent to manage privates successfully.
A bit of advice there Pal, you see the idea is to get them to pay you in advance with the understanding that you're time is so valuable that when they cancel THEY PAY..Of course cancellations work both ways, only YOU DON"T PAY them when you cancel. Pretty hard to cancel classes when you're a school slave, company boy.
Of course you are the all knowing expert of the TEFL trade...
What's it like dealing with student complaints? What's it like covering classes for hungover rejects that only Samara EF would take?
What's it like sucking up to your Russian handlers for a quarter of the money a private would give?
Of course, it's all worth it for the old CV and glowing reference you get for next Cowboy school. I mean EF really took those references about that lame ass from St. Pete you took under your wing so seriously and all, right?.. Hey, but what do they care? They have you, the Janitor, ooops I mean DOS, to clean after them.
Wow Visa support! Great advice you gave on the last post, not to make long term plans..I'm sure that really helped. You're a wealth of information..
You are so fucking STUPID English TEacher X. I make a good $2000 a month off my privates, and that's what, like 15 percent more than you, except without visa support, paid holidays, a comfortable school full of resources, books, a copy machine, free broadband internet, and a bitching espresso machine?
YOU SHIT BALLS! My private students buy me dinner TWICE A WEEK!!! Although, of course, I have to sit and suffer through their incredibly tedious conversations, but ITS WORTH IT JUST TO WATCH YOU SWEAT, ASS-EYES!
HA HA HA HA, private guy must be the ONLY foreigner in town, you think rich guys get rich by giving a bunch of fucking money to some foreign doofus for a bunch of lessons IN ADVANCE?
Yeah, that happens. . .
Visa support in Russia == $300 every 3 to 6 months. How many privates is that, Private Guy? Plus, of course, the $10,000 fine if you get caught, but that's not a worry for you, I'm sure you've got lots of POWERFUL guys who you act like a lap dog to.
OH YEAH??!! FUCK YOU GUYS!! I AM MY OWN BOSS!!! I set my own hours! Except of course I have to study EXACTLY WHEN THE RICH GUYS TELL ME TO, instead of within a contracted 20 hours a week! And man, I have FREEDOM in class, I conduct class EXACTLY LIKE I WANT. . . except when of course the rich guy tells me what he wants to do, and I do it without exception.
Yeah, who the hell needs a reliable and legal salary with all your papers in order, paid accomodation with registration and all that? YOU PUSSIES!!!
Hey, come on, give the guy a break, he's obviously living somewhere he's the only foreigner in town and there are no good schools to work at. come on, give him credit; he's like that kid in MY SIDE OF THE MOUNTAIN, eking out a precarious living in the wilderness.
HATE HATE HATE! Anonymous comments are fun, man, and it's a game anybody can play.
I made $3854 last month from my privates, and shoved it all up my anus!
What's it like sucking up to your bloated, arrogant, obnoxious, slow rich MALE students, when you could be teaching a slew of cute enthusiastic university girls for only 20 percent less? (Unless you count the paid accommodation and visa support and paid holidays and resources and copy machine and free internet and free espresso!)
Hey, is there something wrong with MEN??!!! Is that what you don't like, ETX? You afraid of MALES? Something wrong with hairy, masculine MEN, with their big watches and mustaches and strong aftershave? And their big hunky bodyguards, mmmmm. . .
Mother fucker, X, turning off anonymous comments on your blog. How could you have thought to stop all this fun?
Too drunk to get a job at a chain school? GO FOR PRIVATES!!
I've trained my privates to stand up when I walk into the room. . .
I accidentally closed the door on my privates the other day. It was a mess.
Yeah it does happen, believe it, but not for the majority of morons like you and X!
Haven't you ever heard the joke about the 2 new Russians who bought Rolexes? One says to the other " hey I just got this next door for $10,000 and the other says " you dumbass I paid $20,000 down the street".
Novices, the lot of you! You don't deserve and can't make any money doing this so keep listening to X, he'll show you the way.
Wow a legal salary in Russia, are you kidding me? $300 every few months, now I know why most TEFLer's are sweating, a complete bunch of spineless morons! A $10,000 fine, ohhhnooo I'm shaking... It's OK, keep doubting the Private Guy, all or most of you will be gone from mother Russia soon, back to some pathetic job in a cubicle somewhere, wacking off at night, dreaming of the Students you used to bang and regreting not having the balls to do anything about. Then you'll remeber this post and I'll still be here.... Ha, Ha, Ha.. suckers!!!
I'm an engineer. I make $12,000 a month, plus a company car, company flat, free health club membership, and a per diem.
And you twats are arguing about making $1500 a month versus making $2000 a month?
You're like a battle between red and black ants.
Pretty hard to cancel classes when you're a company boy? Yeah, except for my 23 days of holiday a year plus two days off a week. You got that, penis boy?
Twit. There's not a rich guy IN THE WORLD who would agree to let you cancel lessons indiscriminately, even in fucking rural China or wherever you are.
Yeah, rich guys pay their mistresses $5000 a bang and their english teachers $50 an hour, and the english teachers are the ones who get fucked. . .
And I agree with Private Guy, obviously there's a real friendly and hospitable atmosphere for foreigners in Russia now. They never go checking registrations or anything like that. . .
Hard to believe uh suckers! It's easy to dismiss something you can't pull off. Jealousy.. Wow 23 days ooooooyeahhhh. Ass.. I have vacation whenever I want, not when the school allows me too. Keep squirming you TEFL lowlife bottom feeders, X lives off of parasites like you...
Wait...., hear that! It's your time in mother Russia running out!BOO HOO. X please save them!
"Oh, yeah, baby, I take a vacation whenever I want. (Except I don't get paid for it.)"
Obivously this guy just started teaching privates, made a coupel thou in a month and thinks he's hot shit. And hasn't yet experienced that month when none of his privates pay. . . which will likely be this December. Enjoy your holiday, douchebag!
fortunately, being anonymous, we can't find him and make fun of him.
Dude you'll all be regretting the students you used to bang, while I'm banging my rich guys!
Morons,
Who needs a school's broadband internet, copy machine and espresso machine when you have your own, in your own flat!!
Suffer, suffer... Why are you guys waiting and hoping the Visa thing will change? Your days are numbered in Russia. Putin's cleaning house and you pussies are going to be the first to go. LOL,,,,, Take it like a man...
Yeah, who needs free espresso and free internet and free photocopies when you can PAY for all that stuff by sitting and listening to rich guys! Mmmm their musky smell . . . like a goat. . .
I'll be appointed Minister of Interior Rich Guys while the rest of you get rounded up and shot like a bunch of stray dogs! Rock on!
Been private guy for 2 years now, life's great.. Vacations when I want with money to boot... Jealous, jealous... Eat your hearts out, pussies! Putin's coming to get ya!!! Save them X, save them....
Where's Gap Kid?
You guys should play nice. Somebody's gonna start crying.
Gap Kid was sodomized to death by a gang of rabid wolverines. GIRL POWER!
This has been fun guys, but Mom's ringing the dinner bell.. I gotta go now.
Come on, it was very sensitive of English Teacher X to tell us about his special relationship with that boring guy from Petersburg. Taking him gently under his wing like that, it's very moving. Like Batman and Robin. With nipples on the batsuit.
Hey where's Jason? Mommy won't let him out to play? X, could you please ask him to post more pictures of his ex named Assiyeah. She does have a nice ass.
Special relatinship? Isn't that what they call Britian's relationship with the United States?
This has to be a record X.
You are such a loser. Surely with all the big bucks you're making as a DOS you can afford a decent phone. What kind of example are you setting for your Staff?
Oi, achei seu blog pelo google está bem interessante gostei desse post. Gostaria de falar sobre o CresceNet. O CresceNet é um provedor de internet discada que remunera seus usuários pelo tempo conectado. Exatamente isso que você leu, estão pagando para você conectar. O provedor paga 20 centavos por hora de conexão discada com ligação local para mais de 2100 cidades do Brasil. O CresceNet tem um acelerador de conexão, que deixa sua conexão até 10 vezes mais rápida. Quem utiliza banda larga pode lucrar também, basta se cadastrar no CresceNet e quando for dormir conectar por discada, é possível pagar a ADSL só com o dinheiro da discada. Nos horários de minuto único o gasto com telefone é mínimo e a remuneração do CresceNet generosa. Se você quiser linkar o Cresce.Net(www.provedorcrescenet.com) no seu blog eu ficaria agradecido, até mais e sucesso. If is possible add the CresceNet(www.provedorcrescenet.com) in your blogroll, I thank. Good bye friend.
I should be getting a cut from all these hits I've provoked on your bullshit hate blog. You even have some idiot who can't speak English post on this. What an ASS. Hasn't the little wetback ever heard of Google translate? Hey Pachucko, go find your own sphere in your own language or learn fucking English!
Portuguese isn't the lingua franca, English is! Go find a soccer ball to kick around.
Hey Jason, If you're reading this, where are the nice Ass shots of your ex-girlfriend Assiyeah? I'd ask you on your own overly positive, happy slappy blog, but you're another one who uses the comment filter. Get some balls! TURN IT OFF! You big pussy! Now I know where X got this Comment filter bright idea from. Now look at his English Teacher X site, one boring ass post.
The other thing, how come it took him like 5 or 6 years to become DOS? Most schools you can become an ADOS after 1 year and DOS after like 2 or 3.
Maybe it took him that long to sober up...
I mean, he's off bragging about that O.G. big shot. It took him that long just to score, not even a notorious private student, but through his school. If he was half as good as he says he is, they would be coming directly to him by recommendation not through any school. I think he's the one that reeks of bad aftershave and vodka, not the other way around...
That's why he's the D.O.S. If he had half a brain, was half the Teacher he says he is, he would have just stayed an ordinary teacher at that school, keep a low profile, while having the school take care of all the bureaucratic bullshit, collect his salary, use their resources and collect his privates by being in a position of strength, not really needing the cash thereby demanding better terms from both school and privates.The guy rants like half the other TEFL losers about splits, instead of filling some of that mid-day down time getting drunk or bitching in the staffroom about management, he could've been out here making cash.
So what's his solution? He sells out like a hypocrite and becomes a DOS for less...
He's such a loser... What an ASS.. Speaking of which, I still want to see pictures of Jason's ex-girlfriend Assiyeah's Ass shots!
Private Guy rules!
What's the definition of sell out?
Well, let's see. doing something that we don't like for money.
Things English teahcers don't like:
that would include shlepping out to some office or apartment on the bus, several times a day, and sitting with obnoxious rich guys who don't want to study English and are only doing so because they're too embarrassed not to. . .
That would NOT include trying to get involved in making life easier for new teachers, teacher training, and teaching cute university students. . .
Nor would it include using free broadband internet and the free espresso machine.
Private Guy is a moron; he's a slave to his private students. An indentured servant, basically. Should his private students choose not to study, he has no job. . .
Man, you guys are doofuses! I'm teaching privately and I made $2185 last month!
Oh, shit, my privates all decided to stop studying and go study at a reputable institute with a lot of materials and well-lit comfortable premises. Crap, can I have a job, X?
Anyway, most intelligent people do both. . .
Let's see, $2000 a month from privates versus $1000 a month from one of the institutes, paid accomodation worth $500 - $700, Visa and registration support, return airfare, 3 weeks of paid holidays, and free espresso and itnernet.
Well, you had me, private guy, til you said, "rich guys stinking of aftershave"
Hey, Private Guy, have you ever just thought of offering to suck your rich guys' dicks? They'd pay a lot better, and it wouldn't take as long, and probably be less painful than trying to speak to them.
I'm giggling like a little girl over that one.
He's got too much integrity to suck dick. You could offer to be a bitch, do some receptive anal, imagine how much you'd get then! Crap, fuck working at institutes!
Individual students are without a doubt the hardest part of the job; none of the fun dynamics of a class, no games, just the grueling business of trying to have a conversation with somebody you've got nothing in common with. . . and that's your whole week, Private Guy?
It's a zero-sum game for numerous reasons:
The rich guys themselves are not reliable clients because they travel a lot, are busy a lot, and are therefore a spotty source of income. (And no, they will NOT pay you for cancelled lessons and missed classes, no matter what Private Guy says.)
You can teach rich guys' kids, quite often, but that's not reliable because the kids are generally studying English so they can go study in another country or some such -- then they're gone.
Private Parts there is obviously the only foreigner in his city, though, so he can probably support himself.
Don't worry, Private Parts, no hard feelings, I'll even offer you a job when all of your privates go on vacation and leave you with nothing but your dick in your hand.
Year One: Working at institute. You meet a few privates, and make a few bucks, and think, "Why can't I just go out on my own?"
Year Two: Your few reliable privates provide you with a steady enough income, although, after you consider the housing, visa fees, vacation time, unpaid cancellations by students, etc, it's never as much as you claim to your friends (or people on EFL message boards.)
Year Three: Back working at the institute after your reliable privates decide to emigrate to Australia.
Anonymous said it best in one line,
"most intelligent people do both".
You others don't have a clue. No matter how I point out how easy it is, having it both ways(not taking it both ways)having your own flat with your own loaded cable TV and your own fast broadband internet and your own kick ass $500 espresso machine. Great vacations and still have full school support.. AND YES, THEY DO PAY FOR CANCELLATIONS DUMBASSES, without a 24 hour notice and most are to lazy for that. You all will just never get it! Never will... You all are just a bunch of lazy, no balls, no brain dumbasses... The O.G Private Guy has spoken..... By the way I also work full time for a school, idiots!
P.S.
I want to see Jason's ex-girlfriend Assiyeah's ASS photos!
Private guy, private guy, private guy......
what's your point then, Private Parts? Everybody does that. good extra money, but hardly the best part of the week for me.
Point is I make more, much more than most DOS's without selling out like X did. He switched sides, just read his site.
Thoughout his career he has done nothing but slag TEFL, schools, students and the Teachers who teach them. Just read what he's said about DOS's. That's the point! He's basically turned into everything that he's been slagging for the last 10 years. He didn't need to, there are other ways to make money doing this, not get rich, but do alright.
I've seen too many TEFLers cross over to the "dark side". One minute they're your buddies, the next they're running around with their heads up the boss' ass for a few left over scraps. Ratting out their former mates, defending management etc.
If you're going the management route or want to change things, then have the real balls and open up your own school. Not easy, but possible if you're that good and have the will and the drive... I haven't, but haven't felt the need to. I've been able to balance the security of being part of a school, yet having a bit of independence while making some nice extra money.
There are good schools out there and I fortunately work for one. However, devoting a website to slagging the Trade and the people who do it is hypocritical, especially when you become part of problem....
Isn't doing the job AT ALL hypocritical, if you have a website slagging the job? I mean, you can quit anytime you want and go into investment banking, and make assloads more money.
Hey, he got washing machines for senior teachers, that's something, and he kept an inexperienced guy from getting fired for no reason. He's still a hero to the downtrodden, looks like.
Just look at what he said about DOS's? Just look at what he said about teachers. . .
Ah ha! Penis envy finally reveals itself. Thinking of starting your own school, eh, where you will undoubtedly encourage your students to seek as much private work as possible and not have a DOS?
You shitheels, you obviously dream of managing others, instead of being at the beck and call of some rich guys AND a DOS. Your DOS given you a ruff ticket, has he? Poor baby. Well, privates are good for people who can't manage classroom teaching. . .
Independence, ha, yeah right.
"Oh, are you studying next week Mr. Wang?"
"Well, harumph harumph, I'm not sure."
"Oh, but next week is present perfect, that's very important."
"All right, I'll be studying at 7:00am on Sunday, is that all right with you?"
"Why of course sir! That's a lovely Rolex you're wearing by the way."
You've obviously only read the cartoons on the site. While the teacher tips are a bit on the irreverant side, there's a lot of good and useful information in there about classroom management, dealing with schools and classes, and getting and keeping a job. ETX clearly has a lot of experience with the business and having experienced the ups and downs himself, I'm sure he's a good and helpful DOS. In one entry he even says he uses stuff he wrote on the website to give to new teachers.
All DOS do, generally, is ensure that there's a reasonable standard of teaching going on. Why are you so afriad of DOS's? Do you suck that bad?
I think I liked the Gap Kid alter ego a bit better, but I guess at least this schizophrenic dialogue has something to do with an actual issue of English teaching.
When's Charles Pangolin going to show up again?
I was molested by my uncle.
Hey X, where's my money? You said if I wrote some provacative stuff to increase the amount of hits to your blog I'd get some cash.
You really fucked up turning on that comment filter and had almost not posts, except of course from some boring, lame asses with nothing to say. I let you suffer for over a week with no action. You'd spent sleepless nights wondering whether or not your comment filter idea was a bit rash. You were just about to give in and turn it off when I "the private guy" ressurected and saved your miserable ass..
Well, I'll take a couple of ass shots from Jason's ex-girlfriend Assiyeah, oh yeah.....
Huh? Sorry, I haven't been following this because I make so much money from being an ass-kissing DOS. I've been drinking Dom Perignon out of strippers cleavage at the Spearmint Rhino all week.
In addition to all the hundreds of thousands of dollars that pour in from my website (I'm so awesome I make money even without ads) I'm too busy to post anything.
Suffer, tards.
Don't touch my privates, you stupid honky freaks.
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